Get back on track

I've been hard at work. My recent culture shock/bad attitude is beginning to resolve itself. After several conversations with friends, both Indian and American, here and at home via thew internet, it seems that I am just generally worn out on being in Hyderabad.

Honestly, Hyderabad is not a bad place. My friends here are some of the most wonderful, faith-filled, non-judgemental people I have ever met. It has worn me down though to be in a constant state of "What the hell is going on?" It is a state I find myself in often, standing around, skimming scraps of conversation from my classmates. It is a dream state almost. It feels like I should know what is going on, but I just can't quite understand.

Yesterday, I went out into the open area surrounding the campus for a long bike ride. I followed a road, which turned into a pair of tracks, which turned to a winding cow trail. It was very quiet, and I actually managed to escape into a landscape that had no litter (that is very difficult here). I sat, looking at the small lake and wondered what to do about my deteriorating attitude. I don't really have the resources to be traveling all over India, seeing temples and what not. It has gotten to me a bit, and I was wishing I had joined a trip to Nepal which two friends went on.

With my attitude question still unresolved, I moved on, passing the brush and the rocks and finally coming to where the cow trails again turned into a pair of tracks, and then a road, and then a divided road under contruction. I found myself in a huge soon-to-be-suburb. All of the buildings were in the same state of bare construction-concrete pillars reaching up being lead by bare reinforcement-bar skeltons towards the sky. Here and there were late workers. I wondered who would be coming here to this very modern, squarely laid out village. Surrounding these skeletons were the many village huts of the workers who were building the empty structures.

I'm not really sure what I was hoping to find out on that ride. Pretty views maybe. A pepsi. Space. Piece of mind.